Brinley Says

The hilarious things my daughter comes up with.

  • “Brinley come here. You have yogurt on your neck. I’ll clean it up.”   “No don’t clean it. I’m workin’ it.”
  • “Your daddy’s at work making money.”   “So he can buy me chocolate?”
  • “My back hurts.”   “You should pray and ask Jesus to make it all better.”   “Dear Jesus, please stop punching my back. Amen.”
  • “Brinley, where’s your clavicle?”   “Mom, I gave my crab-table away.”
  • “Brinley, why are you so grumpy this morning?”   “Mom, (sigh) maybe I’m just tired.”
  • “Fulfill your destiny!” (Thanks to the Star Wars Lightsaber iPhone app.)
  • “The fault is mine.” – When did she become so well spoken?
  • “Please turn the light on. I can’t see my eyes!”
  • “Brinley, will you sing the Jesus song?”   “No, I need my to rest now.”
  • “Mom, please turn on the shipper whippers.” Translation: Mom, please turn on the windshield wipers.
  • After explaining MediVac helicopters to Brinley she said, “Don’t worry, mom. The helicopter won’t take you to the doctor. I’m keeping you safe.”
  • “Mommies like to make cookies and daddy’s like to play with balls.”
  • “What are you doing with my cookbook, Brinley?”   “Reading about Jesus.”   “Oh, is that next to the butter section?”  “Yes, it is.”
  • “Brinley, where is your baby sister, Layla?”   “In my mommy’s pants.”
  • “Mom, Brinley got fired.”   “Oh no, Brinley! Why?”   “For smoking.”
  • “No more attitude tonight, Brinley. Capish?”   “Pacheese.”
  • “Ice cream. All girls need ice cream.”
  • “Uh oh. My belly button just fell off.”
  • “That’s my hairytacker.” Translation: That’s my helicopter.
  • “Where do you get all your energy, child?”   “Cheese.”
  • “Brinley, what do you want Santa Claus to put in your stocking this year?”   “Um, I’m thinking…ham!”
  • Brin: “Brinley is beautiful. Brinley is smart. Brinley is funny.”   Mom: “Yes, she is. She is also very silly.”   Brin: “No! I’m not very silly! I’m Brinley!”
  • “Mommy, who’s that?”   “That’s Johnny Depp.”   “Oh, Johnny Depp is handsome.”
  • Star wars just came on the television. Brinley got so excited she squealed, jumped up and down, gave me a hug, said “Thank you, Mom!” and then started dancing around the living room screaming “Yay!”
  • “Stop! listen to Brinley!”   “We’re listening. What do you have to say?”   “I need to go to church!”
  • “Brinley, do you want a little brother?”   “No.”   “What about a little sister?”   “No.”   “What do you want then?”   “A choo-choo train.”
  • “Come on, Monster.”   “I’m not Harry Potter. My name is Brinley.”
  • “Whoopsie, Spaghetti Ohs.”
  • “This is bananas.” (When did my daughter turn into Rachel Zoe?)
  • “I’m going to write my name. B…R…I…6…2…T…Y.”
  • “My leg hurt, then it fell off and I gave it to daddy.”
  • “Mom, I need to watch Star Wars again.”
  • “Knock-knock.”   “Who’s there?”   “Boomer Sooner!”
  • “I want to watch Star Wars at church tonight.”
  • “Is your bath water hot?”   “No.”   “Is it cold?”    “No.”    “Is it warm?”    “No.”   “Is it cool?”   “No.”   “Is it tepid?”   “Yes, my bath is tepid.”
  • “My tummy hurts.”   “Need mommy to kiss it?”    “No, I need church.”
  • “Brin, what’s your name?”   “Jesus Elise.”
  • There’s nothing like being woken up by a naked toddler wearing an Optimus Prime mask saying “I wanna go to church, mom!”
  • Brinley’s new word: Machurchity.    Translation: Maturity
  • “Has anyone seen my Chucks?”    “They’re in the bathroom sink.”    “Why?”    “They’re brushing their teeth.”


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